How Do You Deal With This?

Yesterday, I spent the morning in court as a very close friend received her sentence for making a truly tragic and poorly made decision. The impact that decision has had on her family, her church and maybe even the community is enormous and grievous.

Even so, she and her husband have walked through this situation as well as any two godly people could possibly walk through it. He has been, in every way, supportive and committed to working things out while many men, even many Christian men, would have compounded one bad decision with another and caused further tragic consequences.

My friend (Kelly and I have know her for almost 30 years) has confessed, repented, poured herself out before her Father in heaven and grieved over her sin. She has steadfastly refused to allow any blame to be placed elsewhere and has resolutely demanded that she take full responsibility for her own mistakes. As in any case of totally uncharacteristic behavior, there were extenuating circumstances that would have been easy to fall back upon. She refused to allow anyone to receive blame....but herself.

I don't know that I've seen a couple exhibit such godly behavior in the face of catastrophic circumstances....ever.

All that being said, I'm not sure anything can prepare you for a moment like we experienced in court yesterday. We went into the courtroom as a group of friends, united in our support of our friend. She stood before the judge and listened patiently as he described the severity and repugnance of her crime. She emotionally apologized to the Court, the community, the victim, her family and her loving husband. Then she told the Judge she was ready for whatever he deemed appropriate punishment.

I've never seen so many people hold their breath for so long. We didn't dare breathe or even move while she stood there at the Judge's mercy, waiting to hear her fate.

"Ten years incarceration....but I'm going to suspend all but 18 months of that." She immediately turned to her husband and mouthed the words "I love you..." as she was led away, disappearing through a door at the rear of the court room.

Gone.....just gone. No goodbyes to the family. No time to hug or pray together or to get her things....just gone....for 18 months.

It was absolutely devastating

Metaphors and lessons abound.

These folks are really good folks. She made a bad decision. The court made its decision based, not on the fact that she was and is a really good person and a great mother...but on the bad decision she made. Her punishment was levied on the mistake she made..and not mitigated by the good she has done. She was totally at the mercy of the Judge and his sentence was sovereignly made. She didn't get a chance to go back and make it right and she didn't have the opportunity to "work it out" with the Judge.

Praise God, she had already dealt with a higher authority. Praise God she was able to stand there in His strength and not her own. Praise God, her place in eternity is guaranteed in spite of her human weakness and inability to live a perfect life on her own.

I have no idea how anyone in this position that does not have Christ to hold on to can make it through something like this. We have a hope (Rom 5:5-60). We have a promise that, somehow God will us this for our own good (2 Cor 1:3-6, Rom 8:28).

I love my friends. I'm heartbroken for them. Yet, at the same time, I'm deeply thankful for the example they have set before us in the face of extreme hardship. I'm grateful for the forgiveness I see him working so hard to exhibit. I'm moved by her contrite heart and desire to draw closer to her God. It all makes me long for the day when we can gather over a meal together, look back on all this and bless God for His goodness, his wisdom and His great love for each of us.

It also grieves me to know that there are many others who will never get to experience the joy and freedom of forgiveness that my friends are being blessed with. Our job, as the body of Christ is to let people know that judgment comes swiftly...and there's no going back.

My friend's sentence will end. She will, one day, walk out of jail hopefully, prayerfully, closer to God and into the waiting arms of a loving husband, family and friends. That's the difference for those that know Christ as Savior, their earthly suffering will end, either here on Earth or ultimately in heaven. Those who do not have that blessed assurance will endure a sentence that never ends.